"You've seen what you were and know what you'll beWhen I'm at my most sane I think 'a life is a life.' It doesn't matter how long it is, just how full, how satisfying. When I'm at my most sane I envy him. I am not afraid of death. I'm afraid of a life that has gone on too long. I wish mine had ended two years ago. Then it wouldn't have been an altogether unhappy life. But I can't wish to have left him behind. So in a way, I'm happy for him for having gone first. For that I can take on the pain. That I can do for him.
You've seen it all - there is no more to see."